Happy Christmas Thread

[Moo]

Since most of us buy our turkey from the shop, it has been the 'dear departed' for at least a couple weeks, frozen and shipped to the shop where it has been frozen at least a few days more before we buy it. Therefore, the day it wasn't happy was long before Turkey Day. On Turkey Day, it has no clue what is happening to it.

[American FLEET FAN No1]

That will make me feel so much better, when I'm ramming Sage and Onion up it's..................You get my drift!

[Moo]

Nether region?

[American FLEET FAN No1]

I thought that was Indiana............

[Moo]

No, that would be more like Tennessee and beyond. We're not that far down the country.

[American FLEET FAN No1]

What does that make Alabama, I was scared to death driving through there! Stopping at a small restaurant..................

[Moo]

That would make Alabama be Redneck Central. I've only been to Gulf Shores, which was a nice place as long as none of the locals spoke. I couldn't understand a word they were twanging.. er.. saying.

[American FLEET FAN No1]

You had trouble? Imagine the trouble I had, the only words I understood were........YA'LL WANT GRITS WITH THAT HON?

[Moo]

They have such a strong southern drawl that most of the country can't understand them. Somewhat like the folk from New Jersey.

 

I did have to laugh though, because when we went for breakfast every morning, no matter where we went, or what we ordered, we were asked if "ya'll want grits with that hon?". You'd think they were asking if we wanted caviar the way they sounded like they were offering something special!

 

Did you see the episode of Top Gear where they had to drive through Alabama? I just hope everyone who saw that episode doesn't think the everyone in America is like those rednecks.

[American FLEET FAN No1]

That was a classic............

 

My wife kept asking me, why I went outside every time the waitress asked "Ya'll want grits with that?"

I went to check I wasn't in a McDonalds..........And they were asking: Ya'll want CHIPS with that!

[Moo]

It does feel about the same, doesn't it?

 

When I was working a job several years ago, there were layoffs going on, a few or a department a week, for about 4 weeks. Those of us waiting our turn would always ask each other "You want fries with that?", saying we were practicing for our next job.

[Bitch]

Moo, come and play in my box, I've lost Cantos in it somewhere so he shouldn't bother you Look in MY STUFF

[Moo]

Found it. Looks like he came out of hiding though.

[cantos]

Admit it,you secretly wanted to find me.

[Moo]

I know nothing.

[American FLEET FAN No1]

I heard cantos had been unfaithful, with you Moo.

Cantos was caught behind the Eastside(part of Hornchurches Ground!) with an inflatible Sheep!

[Moo]

He came out of Bitch's box long enough to play with his inflatable friend? Wow!

[Bitch]

He suffered for it

[Moo]

As well he should!

[American FLEET FAN No1]

Originally Posted By: Bitch

He suffered for it

He caught Plastic Hoof and Mouth disease!