Jago

Crikey 1961. Did you forget to pack your meds? Atalanta 2-1 AC Milan AFC Wimbledon 0-1 Millwall (FAC) Preston 1-1 Nottm Forest Southend 1-1 Portsmouth (12:30) Hornchurch 1-0 Enfield Att: 285

Sounds like the boys “done OK” down Bognor way – so I shall not dwell further on that matter. Because this week in the Prediction League the planets aligned and we had the most remarkable set of scores of all time. Yes – as I’m sure you spotted last night when you were checking how badly you’d done – we had our first ever “bimodal” distribution of scores. Those of you with a modicum of mathematical knowledge will need no further explanation. But for the Daily Mail readers amongst you, basically we had 2 very clear humps of scores – you were either sh!t or moderately good. I shall leave the graph here and let you absorb the beauty of it all. (And yes, of course it’s Mick The Bat on the far left). I will not ruin this astonishing phenomenon with further commentary, so simply look at the results below, absorb, curse your misfortune, and try to improve next week. UPSTART DIVISION - you have to feel sorry for the Spud Brothers, 😁 SKID ROW DIVISION - some very tight scores here NEXT WEEK You are playing: Fixtures to predict: Spring Week 5, 16th Feb 2019. Unfortunately our current FA Cup reps, Donny Rovers, play on Sunday so we have to go with AFCW. NOTE – if anyone wants to choose the prediction fixtures one week, just let me know. It’s SUCH a weight of responsibility – and this lot is a right bunch of poo... Atalanta v AC Milan AFC Wimbledon v Millwall (FAC) Preston v Nottm Forest Southend v Portsmouth (12:30) Hornchurch v Enfield Att: GO GO URCHINIOS JAGO

You do realise you are BOTTOM of the prediction league .... Division 2 !!

Atletico Madrid 1-1 Real Madrid Watford 1-2 Everton Middlesbrough 2-1 Leeds (13:00) Stoke City 0-1 West Brom Bognor Regis 1-1 Hornchurch Att: 455

Live commentary is here ... http://mixlr.com/radioclarets/

Hello everyone. And welcome to another rip-roaring week of Prediction League whimsies to follow up the Chins’ rip-roaring win yesterday. It’s still early days, but I think the bookies were right: in Div 1 it’s basically all about who goes down with The Bat and The Hat. In Div 2, the crystal ball gods are obviously with young Fat Tom who scored the second lowest goals of the round - yet still somehow snagged the full three points. It could be another long season for Lana del Jago. This week’s golden boot winner – Mr 1961 himself. He’ll be buying the beers at Bognor no doubt so get yourself down there. Here come the details: Upminster Division Collier Row (S) Division Next week: Div 1 - it's DERBY week Div 2 - it's just another week Please predict on Spring week 4, 9th Feb 2019 by 13:00 Atletico Madrid v Real Madrid Watford v Everton Middlesbrough v Leeds (13:00) Stoke City v West Brom Bognor Regis v Hornchurch Att: UP THE URCHINS Jago

All part of the infamous anti-Blackballed conspiracy theory Meanwhile here are Mick The Bat's scores on the doors... Hibs 3-0 Aberdeen Brighton 1-1 Watford Wigan 0-3 QPR Canvey 1-4 Aveley Hornchurch 4-2 Cor Casuals Att: 305 Yes - I agree. It could be a swift return to Div 2.

If someone sees Simon at the game or he reads this - can you update the Hibs score please. Ta

Hibs 1 -1 Aberdeen Brighton 2 - 1 Watford Wigan 2 - 1 QPR Canvey 2 - 1 Aveley Hornchurch 2 - 1 Cor Casuals Att: 211

OK - let's all use the afternoon usefully by annoying all our friends (those that have any) to vote until we stop bugging them.

* Bump * Can this be stickied at the top so it doesn't get lost? Also change the title to add "please vote for the Urchins" or something as the title isn't very enticing to open at the mo. Ta.

Merstham eh? We'll get there. Early days yet in the Prediction League, but Ozz and Lord Upminster are off to flyers, while Mick The Bat’s dubious promotion is looking ever more, errrr, dubious. And everyone in Div 2 already has at least a point. Which is nice. Well done to Mr D who bagged 9 goals in a generally low-scoring week, not helped by the Highland League match getting frozen off. Yes, I do know it’s January but I did it for Mr Hat. UPMINSTER DIVISION COLLIER ROW (SOUTH) DIVISION NEXT WEEK you are playing Fixtures to predict: Spring Week 3, 2nd Feb 2019 NOTE TO MICK THE BAT - please use cut+paste rather than retyping each one as it's screwing up the spreadsheet (Or use SHIFT+ENTER between lines). This is a friendly warning. Next one will be official, then it's a point deduction for each subsequent offence - which could take you negative Hibs v Aberdeen Brighton v Watford Wigan v QPR Canvey v Aveley Hornchurch v Cor Casuals Att: UP THE URCHINS Jago

AC Milan 2-1 Napoli Arsenal 1-1 Man United (FRI 19:45) Doncaster 2-1 Hornchurch Oldham (FAC) Rothes 2-1 Wick Academy (Highland Lg) Merstham 1-2 Urchins Att: 180

Hello again. A very welcome 3 points yesterday. And you may or may not have got 3 points in the Prediction League. All is revealed below. Please note Friday kick off this week as Saturday FAC games are a bit dullsville. UPMINSTER BILLY BIG BOOTS DIVISION COLLIER ROW ALSO RANS DIVISION NEXT WEEK YOU ARE PLAYING: Couple of feisty derby games there I feel Fixtures to predict: Spring Week 2, Friday 25th Jan AC Milan v Napoli Arsenal v Man United (FRI 19:45) Doncaster v Hornchurch Oldham (FAC) Rothes v Wick Academy (Highland Lg) Merstham v Urchins Att: Allez Les Rouges Jago

As I'm stuck at home with MAN flu, here are the half time scores (not including Arsenal or Celta Vigo games) I really can't see the Hatted One staying up. Still, nice for him to breathe in the oxygen of Billy Big Bollocks League, at least for a couple of months.