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texas 3 kick rule

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The Texas Three Kick Rule


A big city California lawyer went duck hunting in rural Texas. He

shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other

side of a fence.


As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on

his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded,

"I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going into

retrieve it."


The old farmer replied. "This is my property, and you are not coming

over here." The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial

attorneys in the U.S. and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll

sue you and take everything you own."


The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do

things in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with the

Texas Three Kick Rule." The lawyer asked, "What is the Texas Three

Kick Rule?"


The Farmer replied. "Well, first I kick you three times and then you

kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives


The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided

that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the




The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to

the city feller. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work

boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second


nearly ripped the man's nose off his face. The barrister was flat on


belly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to

give up.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his

feet and said, "Okay, you old coot now it's my turn."


The old farmer smiled and said, "Naw, I give up. You can have the


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