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zody

appreciation goes a long way

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My heartfelt appreciation goes out to all of you

 

who have taken the time

 

and trouble to send me "forwards" over the past 12

 

months. Thank you for

 

making me feel safe, secure, blessed and Healthy.

 

Extra thanks to whoever sent me the email about

 

rat crap in the glue on

 

envelopes - cause I now have to go get a wet towel

 

every time I need to

 

seal an envelope.

 

 

 

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones in case I'm

 

pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

 

 

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even

 

though I smell like a

 

water buffalo on a hot day.

 

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone

 

might drug me with an

 

aftershave sample and rob me.

 

I no longer eat KFC because their "chickens" are

 

actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.

 

 

 

I no longer worry about my soul because at last

 

count, I have 363,214 angels looking out for me.

 

Thanks to you, I have learned that God only

 

answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make

 

a wish within five minutes.

 

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to

 

a sick girl on the

 

Internet who is about to die in the hospital (for

 

the 1,387,258th time).

 

I no longer have any money at all in fact - but

 

that will change once I

 

receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are

 

sending me for participating in their special on-line email

 

program.

Yes, I want to thank you all so much for looking

 

out for me that I will now return the favour! If you don't send this

 

e-mail to at least 144,000

 

people in the next 7 minutes, a large pigeon with

 

a wicked case of diarrhoea will land on your head at 5:00 PM this

 

afternoon. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a

 

friend of my next door neighbour's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's

 

cousin's beautician.

 

DO IT NOW OR ELSE.

 

And Have a nice day!

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You have a nice day, too, Zody. <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

 

P.S. May I borrow your address book? I don't seem to know that many people and would hate to take that kind of risk! <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

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