Mother in law, we LOVE her!

[Burnham Lad]

Really old, but still worth a giggle.....

 

A husband and wife were shopping when the wife said, "Darling, it's my mother's birthday tomorrow. What shall we buy her? She would like something electrical." The husband replied, "How about a chair?!?"

 

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The lawyer emailed his client on an overseas trip: "Your mother-in-law passed away in her sleep. Shall we order burial, embalming or cremation?" Back came the reply, "Take no chances - order all three."

 

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At the funeral, a priest was consoling the bereaved man: "Come, come my good man, tears cannot restore your mother-in-law." "Yes, I know... that's why I'm crying."

 

* * *

 

Adam and Eve were the happiest and the luckiest couple in the world, because neither of them had a mother-in-law.

 

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Have you heard about this man who took his mother-in-law to the zoo and threw her into the crocodile pool. He is now being sued by the RSPCA for crocodile abuse.

 

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Two neighbours were having a chat when one said, "I took my dog to the vet today because it bit my mother-in-law." The other asked, "Did you put it to sleep?" "No, of course not," said the first, "I had its teeth sharpened."

 

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The charity collector approaches a man in the street, "Would you like to donate something to the home for the aged?"

"Sure", came the reply, "I'll take round my mother-in-law."

 

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Wife: "Dear, this afternoon the big clock fell off the wall. Had it fallen a moment sooner, my mother would have been hit on the head and badly hurt."

Husband : "SH*T - That damn clock has always been slow."