Matthew Kelly.

[Mersea Pete]

 

Matthew Kelly decides to have a night in to escape all the

press intrusion. So him and his wife nip out to get a take

away, a bottle of wine and a video to watch.

While he is looking around the wine section of his local

Safeway, his wife is browsing around the video aisle.

Suddenly she see's a video that catches her eye, " Hey

Matthew," she calls. " Shall I get ALADDIN ?"

Matthew snaps back," Don't you think I'm in enough trouble

as it is now."....

[Rodders]

Matthew Kelly leaves for work and gives his male partner a peak on the cheek.

 

On his return home he is shocked to find his partner standing in tha hall way with a suitcase.

 

"whats all this about" asks matthew

"I am leaving you because I heard on the news that you are a peadophile" said his partner

 

Matthew leaned forward and said "thats a mighty big word for an eleven year old!"

 

 

agologies very sick!!

 

 

 

[Dave Hedgehog]

Matthew Kelly was due to appear in a special celebrity Stars In Their Eyes show. He was going to be Rolf Harris and do Two Little Boys.......

<img src="/forums/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

[Wilf]

He just bought a little-known American CD on the internet, because he thought Boyz to Men was a delivery service.