And in the beginning........

[Burnham Lad]

In the beginning God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach and green, yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

 

Then using God's great gifts Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Crispy Creme Doughnuts. And Satan said "You want chocolate with that?"

 

And Man said "Yes" and Woman said "and please add some cinnamon sprinkles".  And they gained ten pounds.  And Satan smiled.

 

So God created the healthy yoghurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair.  And Stan brought forth white flour from the wheat and sugar from the cane and combined them.  And Woman went from size 6 to size 14.

 

So God said "Try my fresh green salad".  And Satan present Thousand Island Dressing, nutty croutons and garlic toast on the side.

And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.

 

God then said "I have sent you healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them". And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken fried steak so big it needed its own planner. and Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof. Then God created a light fluffy white cake, named it Angel Food Cake and said "It is good".  And Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food".

 

So God brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those extra pounds.  And Satan gave them cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels.  And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained more pounds.

 

So God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition.  And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy centre into chips and deep-fried them.  And Man gained more pounds.

 

God then gave lean beef so that Man might consumer fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. 

 

But  Satan created McDonalds and its 99 cent double cheeseburger. And then he asked "Do you want fries with that?"  And Man replied "Yes, and supersize them".

And Satan said "Behold, It is good.

 

And Man went into cardiac arrest.

 

God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

 

Then Satan created the National Health Service !.

[Gate4TehWin]

lol