LOVE/LUST/MARRIAGE

[Big J R]

LUST - When your tongues meet across a crowded room.

LOVE - When your eyes meet across a crowded room.

MARRIAGE - When you try to lose your spouse in a crowded room.

 

LUST - When sex is called "screwing."

LOVE - When sex is called "making love."

MARRIAGE - When Intercourse is a town in Pennsylvania.

 

LUST - When you steal everything they own.

LOVE - When you share everything you own.

MARRIAGE - When the bank owns everything.

 

LUST - When the relationship is over if you don't climax.

LOVE - When it doesn't matter if you don't climax.

MARRIAGE - When ... uh ... what's a climax?

 

LUST - When you phone each other to pick a hotel room.

LOVE - When you phone each other just to say, "Hi."

MARRIAGE - When you phone each other to bitch about work.

 

LUST - When all you write is your phone number.

LOVE - When you write poems about your partner.

MARRIAGE - When all you write is cheques.

 

LUST - When your only concern is to find a room with mirrors all around

LOVE - When your only concern is for your partner's feelings.

MARRIAGE - When you're only concern is what's on TV.

 

LUST - When you only see each other naked.

LOVE - When you are proud to be seen in public with your partner.

MARRIAGE - When you never see each other awake.

 

LUST - When your groin twitches every time you see them.

LOVE - When your heart flutters every time you see them.

MARRIAGE - When your wallet empties every time you see them.

 

LUST - When the song on the radio determines how you do it.

LOVE - When all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel.

MARRIAGE - When you listen to talk shows on the radio.

 

LUST - When staying together is something you try not to think about.

LOVE - When breaking up is something you try not to think about.

MARRIAGE - When just getting through the day is your only thought.

 

LUST - When you're only interested in doing things TO your partner.

LOVE - When you're only interested in doing things WITH your partner.

MARRIAGE - When you're only interested in your golf score.

 

LUST - When a rainy day means more time to stay inside and have sex.

LOVE - When a rainy day means more time to stay inside and talk.

MARRIAGE - When a rainy day means it's time to clean the basement.

 

LUST - You only leave the house to buy condoms and lubrication.

LOVE - You only leave the house to buy chocolates and cigarettes.

MARRIAGE - You only leave the house when you're allowed.