Harry Hill Classic One Liners.

[Big J R]

[color:"blue"] Some classic one liners from Harry Hill:

[color:"black"]

"I knew I was going bald when it was taking longer and longer to wash my face."

"The trouble with heroin is... it's very moreish."

"Apparently you can tell a lot about people from what they're like."

"I have a really nice stepladder. Sadly, I never knew my real ladder."

"If you drop a Bible on a field mouse, it'll kill it. So maybe the Bible's not all good ?"

"Is it just me, or does anyone else get the amount you're allowed to drink when you're driving mixed up with the amount you're allowed to take through customs ?"

"What is it about people that repair shoes that makes them so good at cutting keys ? Try going in there with a shoe shaped like a key and see how confused they get."

"My dad used to say - Always fight fire with fire. Which is probably why he was thrown out of the fire brigade."

"My nan has a picture of the United Kingdom tattooed all over her body. You can say what you like about my nan, but at least you know where you are with her."

"What is it with chimpanzees and that middle parting ? It's so 1920's."

"Remember the shouts of SCAB! During the great dermatologists strike... Don't pickit !"

"Last night I had a lovely quattro formaggi pizza. Bit cheesy ."

"My auntie used to say - What you can't see can't hurt you. She died of radiation poisoning a few months back."

"I don't wear a watch. I want my arms to weigh the same."

"Hitler was a bad man. Winston Churchill was a good man. But if you were in a balloon with Hitler and Churchill, and you were losing altitude..."

"Isn't it embarrassing when you cough up a hairball and it isn't your colour ?"

[Hookey]

He also said.....

 

"What's a Shitzu?"

 

A. A zoo with no animals!!!!

[coupwotcoup]

Am I the only person who doesn't find him in the least bit funny? Anyone who is named after a council house estate in east London deserves a damn good kicking..... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

[Big J R]

'Sense of Humour Transplant' for Coupy !!

[Repoman]

Quote:

coupwotcoup said:
Am I the only person who doesn't find him in the least bit funny? Anyone who is named after a council house estate in east London deserves a damn good kicking..... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

No, you're not the only one. I think he's as funny as diarrhoea.

[MbrunoB]

Quote:

Repoman said:

Quote:

coupwotcoup said:
Am I the only person who doesn't find him in the least bit funny? Anyone who is named after a council house estate in east London deserves a damn good kicking..... <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

No, you're not the only one. I think he's as funny as diarrhoea.

I just cant see any humour in him at all and there is a list of others that I cant stand either!

[Hookey]

Good, lets start a shitlist

 

I'll start with Jimmy Carr!!

[Sharming Paula]

I detest Roy Chubby Brown

[Hookey]

Can't think why Paula, he's always so politically correct!!!

[Frankie100]

Ben Elton and his standup was complete crap.